You should really cut yourself some slack. You are doing better than you think you are. In fact, you are probably quite badass in the eyes of your peers and friends. You see, we notice our shortcomings and we know our personal struggles intimately but if no one else does then we’re on the right track.


Ever enviously watched your friend or colleague seemingly sail through life while your problems tend to move at a glacial pace towards resolve? Well, you’re probably giving into some kind of skewed vision of those who appear to have their lives in order. We can likely thank social media for this, considering everyone is posting the very best version of their very normal lives. And you’re probably guilty of this type of posting too. It’s completely acceptable and you don’t have to stop. But you do need to refrain from comparing yourself to all the perfect people around you.


Here are some surefire ways to know that you’re okay, you’re heading for success, and you’re comfortable regardless of how you feel.


You don’t believe you’re nailing it

The fact that you’re reading this article and feeling unsure means that you’re keeping yourself in check. And this dissatisfaction means that you’re still seeking growth and opportunities to learn. You’re still asking questions about how else to do this thing called “life” in a better way. This is an indication of self-awareness and objectivity.


You made all your payments

Did your debit orders go off seamlessly? If so then you’re doing okay. Even if you have a limited budget each month to spend on fun, if you’re paying your bills you’re independent and money conscious.


Because you have a job

Having a job is no longer something that’s obvious. Many people struggle to find employment regardless of their qualifications or experience. The job market is a difficult place and there’s always someone who’s better than you. If you wake up five days a week to complete tasks and projects for money then you’re okay. If you’re working your way into a promotion and a better financial position then you’re better than okay. Be grateful for your job because without it you definitely won’t be okay.


You can go for coffee or order takeaways or take an Uber home

If you’re able to meet your friends for coffee or a cocktail, you can afford to call an Uber to transport you and you can treat yourself to a takeaway then you’re not in survival mode. Even if you can only do these things once or twice a month, you are able to use expendable income to have some fun. Considering the rate of inflation, which has drastically affected the cost of living, if you can throw some cash at socialising then you can high five yourself. You’re doing a little better than just okay.


You have a tribe

Let’s move away from money and material things and look at your personal life. If you have people in your life who love and care for you then you are “#blessed”. If you have a tribe, a couple of friends, colleagues who you get on with and family members who have your back then you shouldn’t feel alone. Having a tribe of people in your world means you have successfully connected with others and nurtured kind, caring relationships with them. This means that on a personal level you are genuinely someone’s cup of tea (or a shot of tequila).


Don’t lie awake at night worrying about whether you’ve got your life sorted. It’s a waste of energy. Many people even older than you right now are still figuring things out. You are allowed to be a little confused, a little anxious and you’re allowed to fail.


If you need a quick fix then set a goal and smash it or start doing something selfless. Smashing goals will make you feel proud of yourself and doing something good for others will inspire a more positive outlook as you’re actively being kind. You might consider donating to a charity each month, which means one less cocktail or takeaway but a whole lot of self-fulfillment. Choose a well-known charity that you can actively engage with. For instance, Doctors without Borders is a world renowned charity organisation that does incredible work. Your donation will help the sick, the needy and the abandoned. You could even take some time out and volunteer with them which will be a life-changing experience.

About The Author

I was born in the Eastern Cape, close to the waves. After getting my degree in Media, Communication and Culture, I knew it was time to make my way to a big city. Not wanting to leave the ocean, Cape Town was the natural choice for me. At first I thought the fast paced world of marketing. But I never forgot that what I'd always wanted to do was write. Now I'm a freelance writer, where my office is my bedroom and my platform is the World Wide Web. I live with my partner and our two beloved Great Danes. When not reading or writing you can probably find me on the beach or exploring nature trails.

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